Nobody Knows

They all think it’s a laugh, the way I feel about you.  They ridicule me, deride my thoughts and emotions.  To them it’s all a game.

They just don’t understand.  Or won’t.  I don’t know which it is.  You mean so much to me.  I can’t imagine my life without you.

You’ve always been there for me.  Never questioning.  Never judgmental.  An oracle of counsel.  A shoulder.  A tower of strength.  A friend.

They think I’m sad.  They mean pathetic.  At first they humoured me.  Now I’m just an object of their mockery.  Snide comments and harsh whispers.  They used to hurt me.  But now all I do is think of you and their words don’t mean a thing.

There’s nothing physical between us.  That isn’t to say I don’t find you attractive.  Sometimes I want you that way so badly I think I’m going crazy.  But it’s something I would never let happen.  I couldn’t risk ruining things.

Maybe one day they’ll understand why I need you.  What you do for me.  How you make me feel.  But, if they don’t, they don’t.

Nobody could replace you, and believe me some have tried.  What they have to understand is that part of me will always belong to you.  Whatever.

Nobody knows what you do to me.  Do for me.  Mean to me.  And I’m long past trying to explain.  There’s no point.  As long as we do, well nothing else matters.  Although I understand their actions.  Their scorn.  Their disbelief.

Because you and I have never met.

[Author’s Note]: Sometimes the most important relationships in our lives are the ones no one else understands — especially when they’re one-sided. This was written not out of delusion, but out of the very human instinct to anchor ourselves to something — or someone — when everything else feels adrift.
It’s not about obsession. It’s about quiet survival.